The computer hung on me
The computer hung on me again! Luckily this time I haven’t typed that much anyway…
The sky was so beautiful last night. It was so clear, letting the moon share its glow and the stars’ dim, twinkling lights to reach the earth. It’s quite hard to believe that it was raining in the day. Today the clouds are back, showering its load slightly.
I guess that’s how life goes too. On one day, you can have all those things that displeases you. But at the end of the day, you’ll reap the sweetness of what comes. Talk about school work, projects, and personal problems. But the next day, those clouds of pain will come back, and it will shower all over again. And in doing so it cleanses us, leaving us with a clearer view of the world.
I’m feeling so much better this week. I’m much more cheerful than before, though I wouldn’t say that I’ve returned to my old self. And I wish that this is not just a passing ‘manic’ season, as an article on ‘Bipolar Disease’ a friend showed me says. And I wish that my life goes more like the graph of “y = - 1 / (x - 17.75)^2″, where x is my age in years and y is my strength in arbitrary unit, rather than some erratic sine function with high angular frequency.
I wish that everything can go as close to what is best for everyone.
I wish that there’s no such thing as personal problems. And I wish there’s no relationship problems stemming from that. And I wish I don’t miss a friend, because the problems actually popped out on me.
I wish I don’t have to stay in the same room as my current roommate - two days ago he woke me up at 11.30 pm, just before I drifted on to deep sleep, just to ask me if he could change the fan to a higher speed for 10 minutes, leaving me not being able to go back to sleep until something like 1 am. Yes, *expletive* you, Zhao Ziqing. And I wish that someone else would be a better choice for me.
I wish that I can do whatever people wants me to do, and whatever I expect myself to do. And I wish that I don’t screw up the things that I actually do.
I wish I don’t have to go to Pulau Tekong tomorrow for S-Cube Seminar in favour of enjoying a normally short day. And I wish that people there won’t mistake foreigners as spies - and probably detain them.
I wish that ‘I wish’ were not the phrase most spoken by people, with the person saying it not being able to do anything about it. I wish the phrase ‘I wish’ never existed. No, I wish regrets never existed.
I wish.
Blog typed offline at: 1:02 AM 12/03/2003